Blame

There are so many unhappy things happening around me nowadays. I really need a break from all these! I am too tired to even care about it anymore.  I got BLAMED for something that I did not do. Do you know how's that feels like?! After all that I have done for the friendship, just one small mistake which I barely involved in it, destroyed all the good things I did in the past. Sad. This friend of mine should know me better that I wont do such thing. I admit it was partly my fault too. I should have stopped the other friends from playing that prank, but I did not. Well, that's just me...I don have the power to overcome them. I am just as weak as you see me the way I am. 
I don't mind being accused or getting the blame for this matter. But what I "tak puas hati" is that, I got all the blame whereas the real culprit is still out there and even still talking to each other. Arghhhhhhh! What have I done to get such treatment! If staying away makes you happy, then I am more than happy to do so. But I just hope we won't regret the decision. 
I really do not hope or wish that all my friends will one day turned to be " Somebody That I Used to Know". I want them to be somebody I know and am happy with them.


Gotye - Somebody That I Used To Know (feat. Kimbra)

Twisted

It's sad when the people that you care the most, those who you put your trust on them and all they do is just plain ignoring it. I know I have lots of weaknesses and I do lots of stupid things. But hey...no one is perfect in this world. It's the effort you put in becoming the man you wanted to be that counts! I am constantly trying my best to impress people around me who I care, but I am just a human (sensitive and weak human) and stupidity is one of the many characteristics a man can have. 


Most people judge so quick by what they see and it never occurs to them that the things they see are not what it seems to be! How I wish they can make the judgement after they found out the truth!

I am really tired trying to impress the people around me just so that I can be treated good and be likable. I thought I can stay strong and continue doing it, but I guess there's limit to what a heart can take. Not trying to brag around but I think my biggest weakness is my kindness. I often try so hard to treat people good no matter what it takes because I still believe in friendship-relationship-or whatever you call it. I have so much faith in it that it blurs me. Sometimes I really cannot believe how a person can take someone for granted and still, feels nothing wrong by doing so. I once told myself it's OK to let people take me for granted as long as I get their attention. Now to think back of it, I feel like an idiot! If a person truly cares for you, he/she will do something for it. I don't have to do anything to impress or to get their attention. I don't know and don't care what people think of the value of a relationship is, but for me, I will always value and treasure the relationships that I have.

The world indeed a cruel place with lots of different people with different minds, thinking and intentions. 

A friend once told me: You treat people around you nice and good and when they don't do the same, you "merajuk". You expect them to treat you back the way you treated them. This is the part of me that I am trying so hard to change! I know there's a saying "Give more, expect less", but it's really hard to do so. My friends are all that I have besides my family. So, I tend to put so much hope/expectation on them and I give them all the love I have. I understand that most of them have partners and therefore they have responsibilities and I should expect less in return from them, but sometimes I just wish all my efforts can be seen and appreciated. And I am truly sorry if those expectations made anyone feels miserable. 

Maybe the way I express my feelings or my "love" is weird and inappropriate, but that's just part of who I am. I just hope the people around me feel it and understands me better. 

I really want to hold on to what I have now, but seriously I am worried I am not that strong anymore to take all that. Things can get so twisted that I don't even know what's real and what's fake anymore. 

There are certain parts of me that I know I must work hard to change but there's also certain part of me that will always remain a part of me!

It's always a GOOD TIME!

If you are feeling down, listen to Owl City & Carly Rae Jepsen - Good Time.  I can ensure you that you will feel much better! Try listening to the song in the morning while watching the music video. Your day will be much more brighter. Such a refreshing song. This is gonna be my addiction for the week!  Hopefully you guys will like this song like I do! Enjoy :)

Woah-oh-oh-oh

It's always a good time
Woah-oh-oh-oh
It's always a good time

Woke up on the right side of the bed
What's up with this Prince song inside my head?
Hands up if you're down to get down tonight
Cuz it's always a good time.

Slept in all my clothes like I didn't care
Hopped into a cab, take me anywhere
I'm in if you're down to get down tonight
Cuz it's always a good time

Good morning and good night
I wake up at twilight
It's gonna be alright
We don't even have to try
It's always a good time

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
It's always a good time
Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
We don't even have to try, it's always a good time.

Freaked out, dropped my phone in the pool again
Checked out of my room hit the ATM
Let's hang out if you're down to get down tonight
Cuz it's always a good time

Good morning and good night
I wake up at twilight
It's gonna be alright we don't even have to try
It's always a good time.

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
It's always a good time
Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
We don't even have to try, it's always a good time.

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
It's always a good time
Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
We don't even have to try, it's always a good time.

Doesn't matter when
It's always a good time then
Doesn't matter where
It's always a good time there

Doesn't matter when,
It's always a good time then

It's always a good time
Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
It's always a good time
Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
We don't even have to try, it's always a good time

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh
It's always a good time
Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh

We don't even have to try, it's always a good time.

Good Idea or Bad Idea?

Nothing special about today. Just some normal routine (going to classes, having dinner and lunch with my fellow friends). One thing bad about today is that I am kinda feeling not good for not having able to attend the birthday celebration of someone. I know I can just go but I think I am the type that follows the majority/crowd. I hope I wont be hated just for that. So, Happy Belated Birthday to that someone! I hope you enjoyed the dinner.


On the other hand, one thing that gets me all excited is that, I found out that I might actually make some extra income by selling bird nests! But as usual, I am paranoid about things such as: 

What if they found out my house location and decided to rob the house?

I cant put my family at risks. Well, by just posting this blog post, I guess I am already announcing it to the world already. How I wish at times like this I am less paranoid and just take the risk! I can really use that side income for things that I need.

Fresh Start!

Ok, I have been abandoning my blog so often I feel so guilty. I promise I will keep updating you. You will be my personal diary starting today! I think that's all for today since I have a test tomorrow and I still haven't touch ANYTHING yet.